Wake Up Hour - Jeff Jones, Travis Terrell
The Blues are at home against Anaheim tonight and it may the Blues game this year that Jeff is least excited about. Jake Allen is going to have to continue to be strong to quite strong to get through these injuries. The Cardinals got deep into it yesterday and may be close to making some franchise-altering moves. Up to 20% of the roster got turned over yesterday, so whether or not you agree with all the moves, the Cardinals are certainly making an attempt to get after it. Travis shows up for the final segment and mocks Jeff for being unable to avoid Star Wars spoilers. Jeff ranks the Star Wars movies to wrap up the hour.
Segment One (with Brandon Lang) - Chris Denman, Travis Terrell, Michael Gaines, Jeff Jones
Travis is playing Here Comes The King to start the show this morning. Are we allowed to make Marcel the Monkey jokes? Probably not. Marcell Ozuna is on the way to Busch and Travis says there's going to be a parade. Alien Ant Farm played a set behind Jen Langosch while she was being interviewed. Travis thinks there's an improvement that could help catch the Cubs but Chris isn't convinced. The Cardinals have the blackest or perhaps best OF in the NL. Gaines is not pumped about Ozuna but the price seemed to be right. Travis is trying to talk himself into Manny Machado coming to St. Louis. Jeff thinks the Cardinals got close to Longoria and Colome but Machado may have been cheaper than expected. The trade for CC Sabathia ended up not really costing the Brewers anything, and he could be re-flipped at the deadline. The Ozuna trade isn't a long term deal, so go get Machado and make it happen. The Marlins are officially a pawn shop right now. Trading with the Marlins has worked out OK for the Cardinals in the past. Brandon Lang (@RealBrandonLang) hops on the show to do what Brandon does. Travis tries to talk about his fantasy team. Ryan Shazier has a complicated name. Travis is putting the hammer down on the Lang interview. Expensive shirts may be a waste.
Segment Two - Chris Denman, Travis Terrell, Michael Gaines, Jeff Jones
Fett's Vette brings us back and no one else is amused by it. Disney is buying 21st Century Fox and it's getting pretty crazy in here. Disney is buying FX, so they can put an Always Sunny ride at Disney World. Why are there so many weird sexual things in Disney movies? Steve Cishek is going to the Cubs so we move into some more baseball talk. Travis is worried about Mike Matheny being the manager and it may hold the Cardinals back. News and stories are all developing throughout the morning on Piscotty and Donaldson. Travis wonders if Matheny would be able to mess up a team with players written in pen. Patrick Wisdom doesn't get selected in the Rule V draft somehow, so I guess everyone hates him. If there's a managerial change, is it Maddux or Oquendo? Jeff and Gaines are trusting the process and Travis only looks at results. Chris's brother is in town from LA and has to watch the Ducks, ironically. Travis is insistent that he knows the most about all of the sports. Should we start giving away Fair or Foul topics as Fair or Foul prizes? Sean Spicer thinks Dickens wrote actual Christmas carols. Omarosa set off the alarms and she was tiptoeing her way through the White House grounds like the Grinch. The Piscotty move is rare because it can work out well for the Cardinals and also it's a humanitarian situation. Warren Sapp sure had fun running his mouth yesterday. Danny Duffy went nuts trying to stay in Kansas City. We really loved Allen Craig. Gaines is trying to fool Travis about Morgan Spurlock.
Segment Three - Chris Denman, Travis Terrell, Michael Gaines, Jeff Jones
Lots of baseball talk today. What move could the Cardinals make today that would truly blow your minds? A giant move with the Rays may end up being the most impactful the Cardinals can me. Derrick Goold has to deal with some pretty ridiculous stuff in his job. Pauly Shore cancelled on us and that's probably for the best so Jeff can't embarrass us. Megan Green is running for Board of Alderman President and we like weed a lot more now. Jeff wants to make some shiitake broth. Chris wants everyone to admit to selling drugs but instead mostly just sold candy bars. Megan Green was quiet on Scottrade which is weird. Chris hates Quidditch and Jeff used to go run at the zoo. Dippin Dots is not the ice cream of the future at all. Sean Spicer hates Dippin Dots. We have a comedy show again! A bomb sniffing dog at O'Hare has a pooping problem. Thankfully the pooping dog is still able to do her job well. Are the bomb dogs in the TSA union? There are definitely black dogs and white dogs. Travis says black people steal golden retrievers. Obama got a white dog because he was pandering. Men with toy dogs are always kept men. Can you name a white dog "Kilo?" The Rockets appear to be changing the game right now in the NBA. The Thunder are coming around finally. The Lakers and Cavs will be fun tonight. The Balls are doing their best to be the Kardashians of basketball. The Cardinals took two minor league OF in the Rule V draft and it seems like dominoes. Gaines is excited for Ozuna and Martinez handshakes. Travis is excited that the team is blacking up. Travis was really concerned about Kevin Shattenkirk's hairline. Fair or Foul closes the show as always.